The Power of Pretense
If we want people to behave in a certain manner, we must set the stage and give them a cue. This is true also when it is ourselves we want to induce. There is no telling how deeply a mind may be affected by the deliberate staging of gestures, acts and symbols.
Pretense is often an indispensable step in the attainment of genuineness. It is a form into which genuine inclinations flow and solidify.”
Eric Hoffer, The Passionate State of Mind
Here are three quick lessons we can take from Hoffer’s quote:
1. Notice, he did not say, “There’s no telling how deeply a mind may be affected by clear communication.” Symbolism, not clarity.
2. He wasn’t talking just about affecting others’ minds in this way, but also our own. Pretense can be very powerful, in both directions.
3. Those who say we must never lie to ourselves are lying to us. Sometimes that is exactly what we need to do.
Set the stage for your own life. Or others will set it for you.
Posted on Friday, July 04, 2008 at 08:32 AM
Tags: human nature, spin, communicationShare Blair:
(8) Reader Comments about The Power of Pretense
Dr. Ben Mack says...
Blair,
Hoffer, and your analysis of Hoffer, is profound as usual.
Now, if we want to make money off of these ideas we need to package them into a useful vertical so folks can see how to apply these ideas to get get what they want and need. Like here=> http://tinyurl.com/68wfne <= setting your own stage.
Thank you Blair!
Posted on 07/04/2008 at 09:33 AM
John Thomas says...
Blair,
So, what you’re saying is that we should “fake it til we make it?”
Hey, Bucky Fuller did it.
I guess we’re in good company!
- John
(Note from Blair: John’s link is to Jurgen Wolff’s excellent blog called Time to Write. If you are at all interested in writing, as a writer or as a reader, this blog is a MUST.)
Posted on 07/04/2008 at 09:42 AM
Blair Warren says...
Ben,
Thanks for the kind words and the link.
Gee, where was this type of information 25 years ago when I was out looking for a wife?
Seriously, I study quite a bit of this type of material due to my interest in persuasion and I’ve found it is often useful not only to “pick up” women, but to keep them. I know my marriage is better for my having learned many of these things. When the seduction ends, so does the relationship.
John,
Thanks for the link to Jurgen’s excellent post.
As for “fake it till you make it,” I’m about 80/20 for it.
While there is clearly a lot of power in that mindset, there is also a lot of potential for fraud - in the legal sense - that comes with it.
I’m convinced there is a line between “faking” things in order to help us become more than we are and “faking” things in order to deceive others into doing things that wouldn’t ordinarily do.
Posted on 07/04/2008 at 10:16 AM
Sean Woodruff says...
Blair said, “I’m convinced there is a line between “faking” things in order to help us become more than we are and “faking” things in order to deceive others into doing things that wouldn’t ordinarily do.”
Yes, yes, yes… it’s the line of intent.
Posted on 07/04/2008 at 10:38 AM
Tony says...
Blair!
I am glad to see that you are allowing comments again. After reading today’s entry to your blog, I thought that this video was somehow apropos. Enjoy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RPsDDr0n9AE
Have fun ... Tony.
Posted on 07/04/2008 at 11:21 AM
John Thomas says...
Ben and Blair,
In just a cursory glance over the Gun site, I saw people’s dreams being encouraged (in a BIG way), failures justified, fears allayed (in some of the testimonials).
Think this guy’s been reading Blair’s stuff?
What? No royalties paid?!? Maybe we should get the RIAA involved!
- John
Posted on 07/04/2008 at 08:55 PM
Janelle says...
That YouTube video was something else. Whew!
Posted on 07/05/2008 at 11:00 AM
Kathy says...
A number of years ago when I was going through horrific personal problems and my self esteem was at zero, I had to pretend to be confident at work so no-one would see how worthless a person I was.
It took a few years but one day I realized I wasn’t pretending to be confident any more - I really was confident again and my self esteem started to return.
So I say yes - fake it till you make it - it really is worthwhile and it works.
Kathy
Posted on 07/05/2008 at 10:52 PM
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