Marketing test - any takers?

Though I’ve bashed the Law of Attraction and The Secret for some time, I now realize it has been in vain.

It seems some people are going to spend their money on New Age ideas no matter how absurd some of the ideas may be. And if that’s what they want, who am I to stop them?

So - brace yourself - I’m thinking about switching sides. Instead of bashing these ideas, I thinking about selling them. But first I’m going to run a little marketing test to see if the idea is feasible. If it does as well as I think it will, I’ll probably get started right away.I will tell you what you want to hear. It makes no difference to me; if you want to hear it, I’ll say it.

Anyway, here’s the offer I’m making. Please let me know if you are interested.

For just half the price of what the other LOA gurus are charging, here’s what I’m willing to do:

1) I will tell you what you want to hear. Whether it’s “Anything is possible”, “The Universe is like a catalog”, “Feeling good is the most important thing”, “This is based on science”, “It’s really that easy”, etc. It makes no difference to me; if you want to hear it, I’ll say it.

2) I will provide anecdotal evidence to “prove” that the things you want to hear are true. If I can’t find stories that seem to prove these things, I will spin and/or create stories that will.

3) I will not disclose evidence I uncover that may disprove these ideas.

4) If you can’t get the first ideas to work, I’ll come up with new ones that probably won’t work either - for an extra charge, of course.

5) I will say all these things with a straight face and promise to never make fun of you except in private to my closest friends and associates.After you pay me, I’ll provide more “proof” the ideas work by showcasing all the great things I bought with your money.

And finally…

6) After you pay me, I’ll provide more “proof” the ideas work by showcasing all the great things I bought with your money.

That’s right. I’ll do all this for *half* the price the other guys are charging. But I’m only accepting a handful of students for this marketing test so don’t delay.

Operators are standing by.

PS. If credentials are important to you, I am willing to buy some to make my material seem more legitimate. When writing, please specify what degrees you’d like me to have so that I can order them online and have them delivered before we get started.

Posted on Sunday, February 24, 2008 at 04:22 PM

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Tags: law of attraction, the secret, humor

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(29) Reader Comments about Marketing test - any takers?

Janelle Kleppin says...

LOL This should come with a warning label, Blair ... I nearly fell outta my chair laughing! Cheers!

Posted on 02/24/2008 at 06:26 PM

Mark Edward Brown says...

Blair,

You Rock! True to form and fashion, I love your take on “those” approaches and couldn’t agree with you more.

Hey, if you like I’ll provide a testimonial for your sales page!

Keep on keepin it real,

Mark Edward Brown

AKA - The Militant Marketer

Posted on 02/24/2008 at 06:26 PM

walt says...

Blair- I almost lost my lunch when I read the post (rollin’ on the floor laughin’...go for it, I’m interested in the results

Walt

Posted on 02/24/2008 at 07:03 PM

Melissa says...

Hey Blair,

If you throw in the Brooklyn bridge, you can count me in!

With Bated Breath,
Melissa

Posted on 02/24/2008 at 07:53 PM

Must Have Marketing Tips says...

Too Funny!!!

I know you were talking about self help gurus specifically, but several of your points are equally valid with money making gurus. You made me remember a story I heard years ago.

Here’s the gist.

An extremely famous money making guru once came off stage after a long day of seminar presentations. One of his friends told him he was the king of the real estate investing business.

It has been rumored that his response was, “This ain’t the real estate investing biz… this is SHOW BIZ!”

I believe the story is true.

Joe Lavery

Posted on 02/24/2008 at 08:10 PM

Jeff says...

I’ll take it...is that half off of the price others paid for the same thing about 6 months ago? Plus, can you throw in a bonus? Perhaps an internet marketing package on how to make 7 figures next month (forget 6 figures; too passe)...an ebook valued at $30 that I can get for free any where else...or a course on how to buy real estate with no money, no credit and no idea what I am doing!

Posted on 02/24/2008 at 08:57 PM

walt says...

Blair, on a serious note, I wondered what would happen if you polled the people who felt “enlightened” by LOA and the Secret to find out how many of them really took “Action” or chose to just wait for abundance to fall into their laps...hhhhhmmmmm?

Walt

Posted on 02/24/2008 at 09:05 PM

Blair Warren says...

I don’t understand.

When the LOA gurus make an offer like this, people jump on it.

When I make the same offer, people think I’m kidding.

I guess the lesson is, if you’re going to lie to people, it doesn’t pay to be honest about it.

I won’t make *that* mistake again.

Posted on 02/24/2008 at 09:10 PM

Steve says...

Blair, Why would you want to? Maybe for fun? There are too many people out there selling out their principles for the almighty dollar! Look at all the “Honorable Assholes” who supposedly work for us in government who will sell their souls and us out to the Federal Reserve for a little power and worthless paper!

If you’re going to do it, do it as an experiment for say 6 months just to show your readers it was a joke!

Now, when it comes to the Bullshit Department on your degrees you must have four!

!. A standard 4 year degree in Bullshitology! 2. A Masters degree in Bullshitology from B. U. L. L. S. H. I. T. U.! or Bullshit University Lower Level Sam Houston Institute of Turgidity! 3. Your Doctorate degree in Bullshitology and 4. Your Master Bullshit Artists degree like the one :"Tony Baloney” Robbins and many other Master Bullshit Artists and Charlatans have, comes from the prestigious P.T. Barnum: Higher Learning School of Bullshitology!

Seriously though, we need more people like you who will not compromise their principles and beliefs for the easy buck! Best Regards!

Posted on 02/24/2008 at 09:10 PM

Robo says...

Is there an EZ payment plan? I’m afraid my visa is almost maxed out!!

HELP! PULEEEEAZE!!

Posted on 02/24/2008 at 09:12 PM

Blair Warren says...

Steve says…

Seriously though, we need more people like you who will not compromise their principles and beliefs for the easy buck!

No, no, no. We do *not* need more people like me. Trust me on that. Heck, I felt bad having two children with my wife for that very reason. Thankfully they turned out like her. Whew!

Posted on 02/24/2008 at 09:26 PM

John Thomas says...

Blair,

Count me in! In fact, I’ll take two! And for the degrees that you need to impress me even more, I suggest you go to any scientific school and get two B.S. degrees. I mean, hey, we’re talking about science here, right?

- John

Posted on 02/24/2008 at 09:32 PM

Albert Grande says...

The check is in the mail, Blair. Really. Half price sounds like the deal of the century.
Do we get our own degree out of this?
thanks.

Posted on 02/24/2008 at 10:06 PM

Rational Thinking says...

I see I’m late again - a little local difficulty with the ISP Well Blair, here’s a breathtakingly novel idea - teach it for free, on your website, and explain as you go along exactly what is so appealing about each step:-)

BTW - I finally found your riddle today. Do you know what immediately leapt into my mind - The Grateful Dead. As I have said elsewhere, I cannot begin to explain even to myself why I find that amusing.

Great piece - rolling on the floor - almost:-)

Posted on 02/24/2008 at 11:06 PM

Jason says...

Hello Blair. I’m wondering, why are you so opposed to the Law of Attraction? Have you yourself ever implemented any of the techniques for say 30 days to see what your results are? I mean, I can agree with your viewpoint on the various, Oprah/Pollyannish/Instant Magic bullshit that floats around out there. You can’t just affirm/visualize/pray/ etc. and expect what you want to just drop into your lap. However, these techniques, combined with action do work. This is MY experience talking, NOT that bitch Oprah. Just wondering if you’ve done any actual work with this stuff.

Posted on 02/24/2008 at 11:31 PM

Blair Warren says...

Hi Jason,

Yes, I have quite a bit of experience working with the ideas behind LOA, manifesting, attracting, etc.

In addition to my own experiments and experiences, for about 15 years I was very close friends with one of the “gurus” featured in The Secret. So not only do I have experience with the ideas behind LOA, I have experience with the people behind the ideas behind LOA. I believe this gives me a perspective that most people who are simply proponents and practitioners of theses ideas don’t have.

Feel free to search my site for “Law of Attraction” and “The Secret” and you’ll find numerous articles that will give you some more background on me and LOA. Perhaps some of this will be helpful.

You might also want to listen to a free interview about LOA that I participated in about a year ago. You’ll find the MP3 of that interview at http://thetruthisthesecret.com

For what it’s worth, I do not believe that LOA is 100% crap. I believe that there is “something” to the ideas that many LOA teachers teach.

In a “nut” shell, (pun intended), my biggest problem with this whole situation is that many, if not most, of the LOA teachers make LOA out to be something it is not (i.e. scientific, quantum physics, 100% effective, etc.) in order to “cash in” on the whole Secret phenomenon.

Many good people have been hurt by buying into this oversold-version of LOA. I know because I’ve worked with many of them after they “woke up” and realized how they’d been swindled.

Anyway, hopefully this answers you question. If not, maybe some of the other resources I pointed out will. And if they don’t, well, you know where to find me.

Posted on 02/25/2008 at 12:28 AM

Jason says...

Okay, cool, I see what you’re saying. Also, I found that bit about Kiva.org, very interesting read. I knew what microloans were and thought the idea was interesting and I think its awesome there is an orginization like that. I agree with you thats probably a very powerful way to help people instead of blaming them for bringing the shit on themselves.

Posted on 02/25/2008 at 03:02 AM

Rational Thinking says...

“Something” to it, eh? Well, I bow to your superior judgment Have fun.

Posted on 02/25/2008 at 03:30 AM

Blair Warren says...

Rational Thinking says…

“Something” to it, eh? Well, I bow to your superior judgment .”

Okay, this is the type of statement that causes me to lose another subset of my readers (damn, how many more subsets can I lose before I’m at zero?). I’m referring to the hardcore skeptics.

Not saying you are one RT or that I am not one, just using your comment as an opportunity to make a quick point.

Notice I put “something” in quotes. I did that to hopefully caution people not to read too much into that word, that I am using it in a very specific way.

The “something” that I will grant LOA’ers is that, yes, acting “as if” our thoughts are “magnetic” and that we are “100% responsible for everything that happens in our lives” can be helpful at times - I repeat “at times” as in, not ALL the time.

(Holy crap, look at how many words I had to quote, cap, and cajole just to make that point! I probably just lost another subject of my readers - the strict grammarians.)

Obviously a “can do” attitude can sometimes be beneficial. But, in my mind, this doesn’t mean a “can do attitude” beams waves into the universe and pulls things toward you. It just means it might help get a little more effort out of oneself and help you convey a more self-confident attitude, which can sometimes help. And seeing oneself as 100% responsible might help you feel like less of a victim which might stoke your psyche a bit more.

But clearly - in my mind at least - there are situations in which this type of attitude is *very* dangerous and *very* cruel. For example, when the “can do attitude” gives one so much confidence that basic safeguard measures aren’t followed. After all, why take safeguards when you “just know” you’re going to succeed? Also, in the immediate wake of certain situations such as being victimized by crime or being diagnosed with a life threatening disease, to see oneself as 100% responsible for these things is to risk serious psychological damage. For many, the guilt is too much to bear and I’ll let you imagine what that might lead them to do.

(I realize I’m overstepping the bounds of my expertise here as I am NOT a mental health professional, but I do think this last argument is valid. Still, I probably just lost my “therapist subset” with that one.)

So before there isn’t anyone left to finish reading this comment, I’ll just end it with this:

If people would just call the whole LOA philosophy by another name - perhaps the Philosophy of Attraction or the Mindset of Attraction - and stop trying to represent it as being based on, and validated by, science, we wouldn’t be having this discussion. And I’d probably still have a reader or two left.

Damn people. I’m referring to the over-the-top LOA gurus, not my readers - not that I have any left, mind you.

Is anybody even out there? Anyone? Ferris? Mom?

Well, I guess it’s official. Nobody loves me.

Posted on 02/25/2008 at 05:18 AM

Rational Thinking says...

Relax Blair - I put it in quotes too

You know, you think it’s fundamentally a harmless idea - is that what you’re saying?

Surely you aren’t suggesting that magical thinking is real?

I think Sashen has made the point that it’s been in use awhile, and until it regularly kills us, we’ll keep using it. To my mind that’s a very good point.

Posted on 02/25/2008 at 05:39 AM

Peter Blue says...

Dear Blair!

If the whole LOA think creates a conciousness for taking responsibility for one’ s own life, that’s a good thing to become more public.
Those who turn it into some kind of get rich quick money making machine disqualify themselves.
I could see it clearly, when I looked at who’s newsletter I’ m still subscribed to. Most of them are cancelled.
The lie is, that the LOA gang wants to tell you, that shit don’t happen anymore if you think the right thought.
But life is about polarities, life and death, good and bad.
One can’t exist without each other.
Our task is to attain a more detached point of being, where the phenomina of everyday life don’t make us jump like a cork floating on the waves.
Just these days I read a lot of sutras from tibetan mystic Atisha.
His sutras are an almost scientific instruction on how to deal with phenomena and how to find real peace, how to get independent prom things happening.
And yes, you will find thoughts that resemble the LOA.
But they exist in a far bigger context, where they make sense.

Peter

Posted on 02/25/2008 at 05:59 AM

John Fogg says...

So Blair… how much?

Posted on 02/25/2008 at 08:36 AM

John Lundholm says...

As a part of the mental health subset (actually a member of a subset of that subset)LOA has been a boon to our professions.

Even though I have transitioned out of working with most therapy clients, if I had known that LOA would become so popular I might have stuck with it. Why? my colleague are seeing an increasing number of the fall out from LOA that just doesn’t work. Taking 100% responsibility for your choices and what you do with what happens (which I advocate) is a far cry from taking 100% responsiblity for reality and what happens.

People who swallow the lie that you create reality suffer a disorder marked by extreme anxiety manifested by guilt and depression problems (Law of Attraction Disorder of Created Reality Anxiety Problems or LOAD of CRAP for short). Rather that switch sides why not start a rehab program for LOAD of CRAP sufferers? Maybe it’s disease foir which funding is available.

Posted on 02/25/2008 at 10:12 AM

Blair Warren says...

Rational thinking asks…

“You know, you think it’s fundamentally a harmless idea - is that what you’re saying?

Surely you aren’t suggesting that magical thinking is real?”

Great questions. In fact, I’m going to write a post inspired by your second one. But for now, here’s a quick response:

In general, I do not think ideas in and of themselves are dangerous. It is how people “hold” the ideas and what they do with them that makes them dangerous. In that regard, I do believe that LOA can be very harmful in certain situations and for certain individuals.

As for “magical thinking” being real, well, this is harder for me to answer.

In short, I do not think that “magical thinking” (i.e. the idea that our thoughts somehow “shoot out” of us and impact matter all by themselves) is a real phenomenon.

But, and this is a big but…

If we treat LOA as a metaphor or myth, I believe it *can* be of *limited* value in certain situations and with certain people. Not because it “changes the universe” but because it changes US.

The trouble is, from what I can tell, very few people can entertain a metaphorical/mythical idea for very long without eventually coming to believe that the idea is literally true.

And THIS is where things become very, very scary.

In other words, myths treated as myths may serve a valid purpose. But myths treated as literal truths almost always lead to bad, bad things. IMHO.

Posted on 02/25/2008 at 10:28 AM

Rational Thinking says...

Yes indeed. I look forward to the post

Posted on 02/25/2008 at 10:46 AM

Tom Welsh says...

Must....resist......giving credit card number.......

Posted on 02/25/2008 at 02:00 PM

Rational Thinking says...

Yes, you must. There’s ALWAYS a price. And really, a good maxim is to take a closer look at the beneficiaries, rather than the ‘victims’. Follow the money

Posted on 02/25/2008 at 02:26 PM

truth says...

blair you are awsome...but im wondering how you’ve lasted this long going against what ppl WANT to think?..? Now! we know ppl cant think right, they just follow others...but what are we to do about mass sheeply thinkin??? one would think lead them in the right direction but the problem IS any direction as a sheep is the wrong direction....and now takeing into account that sheep with lazy thinking patterns remain that way because someone is allways doing their thinking work for them....i bring up a question.......as leaders through logic arent we just postponing their learning curve by teaching them right???? therefor acually doing more harm...??!? GUYS I THINK IM ABOUT TO JUMP SHIP!!!....start gettin in where i fit in LOL. stop hatin and start particapatin...use this advatage to my advantage...some one tell me im wrong*said as a plee as humans do when trying to deny the blatent truth* lol

Posted on 02/26/2008 at 06:23 PM

Cathy Stucker says...

I can’t wait to sign up, but I can’t find the buy button anywhere. ;o)

Funny post, but kinda sad that so many people fail to question what they are told and lack the ability to think for themselves.

Posted on 07/12/2008 at 04:29 PM